I’m a Massage Therapist in missoula. Here’s What I Notice But Don’t Say.
I work as a massage therapist in Missoula, and to save you some time—because most people come in saying the same thing—here are the things I wish I could plaster on to my client’s foreheads for them to master and not forget:
They all come in saying,
“My shoulders are always really tight.”
“I think I just slept wrong, though.”
“I just need it worked out in 60-minutes and I’ll never need a massage again.”
Okay, that last one is more suggested but unsaid. ;)
And I just sit over here and nod like… yeah, okay. 🙂
But here’s what I’ve actually noticed:
Your body is not confused.
I don’t believe in coincidences. And I don’t believe your pain is just random, unlucky, or consistently tight because “posture.”
Most everything is patterned.
That includes the posture. But, where does the pattern come from?
Because the way you walk, carry yourself, and speak is patterned.
The position you sit in every day is patterned.
The jobs you choose that utilize certain movements, all patterned.
And patterns are learned. Often at a very early age (look around and you’ll never unsee the way parents, children, and siblings mimic the way the other walks, talks, sits, etc).
And the truth is, I can feel the way you hold yourself before you even say a word.
The way your shoulders are slightly braced like you’re expecting something.
The way your breath stops halfway down your chest.
The way your jaw is working overtime to hold something in.
And then 10 minutes later…
You start telling me about your life, and it matches exactly. :)
Every time.
You tell me about the job you hate but “it’s fine,” because you learned to settle for “fine” a long time ago.
You open up about the relationship where you don’t say what you actually feel, but you feel like you’re just too much of a problem anyways.
You keep a strong face when talking about something extremely heartbreaking, because you always keep it together for everyone else.
You talk about the constant low-level stress you’ve just learned to live with.
And I’m like… yeah. That tracks.
Because your body already told me that.
This is the part I don’t always say:
I can’t outwork the way you abandon yourself every day.
I can help your body soften for a little while.
I can create space for you to take some deep breaths.
I can give you short-term relief.
But if you leave and go right back to overriding everything you feel…
Your body is going to tighten right back up. Which is something I’ve seen from the beginning of my career, but have become increasingly aware of in my bodywork sessions here in Missoula.
And before you say it—it’s not because your body’s broken. It’s not because you yourself are broken.
It’s because your body is doing exactly what it’s been told to do, living inside of a system that tells us that the more we carry and don’t break (or don’t show it), the better off we’ll be.
However subconscious that might be.
In essence, your symptoms make sense for what you’ve lived.
The chronic muscular tension matches that way you force yourself into that job you hate, day after day.
The fatigue that plagues you, matches the way you’ve never learned to say “no” when someone asks something of you.
The shutdown you experience when I ask, “Would you like me to adjust pressure” and you respond with “Whatever you want”—matches the guarding I feel in your fascia.
The overwhelm, the stress you vent to me about—feels like the body that can’t relax and constantly wiggles for the 60mins you’re on my table.
None of this is a failure.
This is all protection. And many, many patterns of it.
The shift doesn’t happen when we force your body to relax (can we quit with the “just use more pressure and force your way in” already?)—
it happens when your mind, body, and soul feel like they’re safe to be in alignment with what it is you’re truly needing.
That might look like:
actually saying what you feel (letting go of the passive-aggressive bullshit, yes)
letting yourself cry and express vulnerability
feeling anger instead of swallowing it
taking up space instead of shrinking
things that don’t seem related to your shoulders…
but they are, babe. <3
This is why some people get massages for years and nothing really changes, and why others come in and everything starts changing.
It’s not about pressure.
It’s about bravery.
It’s about what you’re willing to feel and change outside the session.
I’m not here to fix your body, because it’s not broken.
I’m here to work with it and provide you the space you need to access understanding of it.
Because it’s been telling the truth this whole time.
If you’re ready to actually listen to it…